The Oath of Office

Newly elected congressman Keith Ellison (D-Minn) is the first Muslim to be elected to the United States Congress. Good for him. He joins the hundreds of Christians, Jews, Mormons, Atheists and Agnostics who have served in this body through the years. Thing is, Mr. Ellison is insisting that he be allowed to take the oath of office by swearing on a Koran, not the Bible. Something that has never been done in our history. Is this really such a big deal? I think so. But I have some freelance to work on, so I’ll leave it to Dennis Prager to explain why.

Later,

Fox

Gonna Fly Now

I admit it. I actually can’t wait for Rocky Balboa to open on December 22. I’ll wait for the chuckling to stop.

Okay, here’s the backstory: The original Rocky, which was released 30 years ago in 1976, is the first movie I remember seeing in the theater. I was four. I can only assume my parents figured I wouldn’t really pay attention. But I did. Fortunately for them, my brother was three years older and I was smart enough to not try whaling on him when we got home.

I loved that first movie. What kid wouldn’t? You’re small, you have no rights, you can’t really do anything, you’re the youngest sibling (in my case) and you’re a bit of an introvert (severely so, in my case). You are Rocky. The underdog that overreaches. The guy who doesn’t just dream the impossible dream, he beats that dream into submission one side of beef at a time. Who wouldn’t like that?

(Apparently, everybody liked it. After all, it did win Academy Awards for Best Director and Best Picture, along with nominations for Best Actor and Best Screenplay for Stallone.)

I grew up with Rocky Balboa. The sequel where he actually wins the title (forgot that he only tied in the first one, did you?) The third one where Mr. T vows to take his woman and “Eye of the Tiger” sets the stage for one of the Best TV Spots Ever. Rocky IV brought us some sweet jingoism, Dolph Lundgren and the future Ms. Ex-Stallone Brigitte Nielsen, as well as another sweet Survivor tune (“Burning Heart”) that I played in 7th-grade band. I believe there was also a fifth Rocky movie, but most people choose to disavow its existence.

I played “Gonna Fly Now” in the 7th-grade talent show. Maynard Ferguson I ain’t, but I rocked that junior high gym stone cold. Heck yeah.

So yes, I have an affinity for the series as a whole. But I’m also interested in this final chapter because it mirrors Stallone’s own life. Rocky was his triumph. His nadir was, well, how do you choose? Cobra? Over the Top? Stop! Or My Mom Will Shoot? Driven? And did I mention Brigitte “Now Ms. Ex-Flava Flav” Nielsen?

Wow.

But now he’s back. He wrote the screenplay. He directed the movie. His arms are thicker than my torso. He’s even pitching the movie to the faith-based audience.

Are these good things? Maybe, maybe not. But I’ll be pulling for the Italian Stallion. After all, I do love a good underdog story.

Later,

Fox

Burger King Brings the Pain

This might be the coolest thing Cripin Porter Bogusky Fox has ever done. BKGamer.com. Go now. Go on. Git. Don’t make me sic Jack Palance on you.

Later,

Fox

Consumer Generated Gunk

There’s a lot of flotsam floating about the blogosphere at the moment regarding Consumer Generated Content. I know this only because I just read my buddy James’s blog over at Yonder Ponder. Otherwise, I probably would’ve ignored the whole mess.

Here’s an argument that is either for or against CGC, as it is known. Which side of the argument you think it’s for depends on your personal point of view. And if you can't guess mine, you must be new around here.




Happy trails,

Fox

I love the new Roman & Victor campaign for Citi. Spots directed by Jared Hess. Print shot by Aaron “Kip Dynamite” Ruell. Good stuff. But is anybody else wondering how they got Judd Hirsh to do this? I would’ve thought Rev. Jim to be more appropriate. But hey, whatever works. And thanks to American Copywriter for the stolen image.

Later,

Fox

In a World...

You’ve heard his voice approximately six billion times. You’ve even seen him in the recent Geico television campaign. Now find out a little more about the man who makes more in one day of talking than I do in over a year of pimping the value. Ladies and gentlemen, Don LaFontaine.

Yes, I know this isn’t a new segment, but it’s still good for the kids.

Later,

Fox

I Blog Bigger Than You

Jack Palance died yesterday. Or, more likely, he chose to stop living. I doubt death held much sway over Jack Palance. He was one of my favorite actors for a few simple, if possibly odd, reasons:

1. He hosted the television version of “Ripley’s…Believe It or Not” when I was a kid. The best part of the entire show was when he would end a segment by intoning, “Believe it! [then he’d sharply inhale] Or not!”



2. As most people know, Jack, at age 114, he performed 2,439 one-arm push-ups at the Academy Awards. I’m still working on my first.



3. In the mid 90s he cut a commercial for Aqua Velva that included not one, but two eminently quotable lines. “I don’t need some fancy cologne to tell me I’m a man,” and, “Confidence is so sexy, don’t you think?”

Can you argue with either of those statements? No. You can’t. And if you try, Mr. Palance’s disembodied soul will hunt you down and crush you like the Hai Karate-wearing punk you are.

Believe it. [sharp inhale] Or not.

Later,

Fox

Death to MarCommunism

Are you a marketing communications specialist? Do you synthesize actionable items by day and move from strength to strength at night? Going forward, do you seek to exploit the synergies of multimedia interactivity with micro-targeted opt-in programs?

Then stop reading now.

Hate is a strong word. So when I say that I hate the phrase “marketing communications,” you can trust that I’m not using it for hyperbole. I hate marketing communications consultants. I hate marketing communications materials. And I have difficulty trusting any entity that refers to itself as a marketing communications firm. (Double points off if “strategic” is in front of that descriptor. Gee, you use strategy? How novel. We were looking for something a bit more willy-nilly.)

Why such vitriol for the Double M of Mephistopheles? Because the phrase does exactly what “marketing communications” aren’t supposed to do: complicate the truth. Marketing communications – even junk mail, spam blasts and flyers touting the local club for discriminating gentlemen – are advertising. Period. So call it advertising.

People know what advertising is.

Which is, of course, the reason some people don’t like calling it advertising.

Advertising connotes a certain amount of creativity went into the finished piece. A bit of artistry. A touch of inspiration. Basically, the very things most marketing communications materials lack.

Marketing communications materials are by the numbers. They stick to tried-and-supposedly-true formulas. Sending a direct mail letter? Make it a personal appeal from someone in the company, but write it with plenty of bullet points – and always have an odd number of bullet points.

And please avoid any form of mass media. Marketing communications must be targeted according to ZIP, age, income, hair color, religious affiliation and preference for tomatoes or tomahtoes.

Marketing communications materials show their strategy. Wouldn’t want the audience to misinterpret anything by letting a little entertainment value get in the way of the message. And would an exclamation point or three kill you? Didn’t think so!

By claiming to produce marketing communications materials instead of advertising, the offending company absolves itself from having to produce good work. Keep production cheap and response rates good enough and you’ve got yourself a respectable ROI, Skippy. So what if the brand image suffers? Live in the now, man!

Of course, many clients love marketing materials. They’re concrete. They’re measurable. They have a specific purpose. They’re for marketing, by gum, and we gotta sell, sell, sell! Advertising might be about moving the needle, but it might also just create warm, fuzzy feelings in consumers’ hearts. Where does that leave you? People feeling sorry for you when you file Chapter 11? Not on this marketing manager’s watch, bub.

Now, I’ve dealt with agencies that used the term “marketing communications” that were, at their heart, ad agencies. They just got sucked into the jargon a bit. Such is life. I’ve also dealt with so-called advertising agencies that did nothing but produce marketing communications materials. You find a lot of frustrated people (and not just creatives) in those shops.

I’ve spouted this rant to get down to this: Can we please just get back to doing some good ads? People like good ads. They rewind the Tivo for good ads. They email good ads to friends. They remember good ads. They act upon good ads.

Ads, people, ads.

Because no one has ever run up to a friend, their voice quivering with excitement, and said, “Dude, check out these sweet marketing communications I got last night!”

Later,

Fox

Congratulations, America

You get what you deserve.

Fox

Get Out and Vote. Then Shut Up.

Tomorrow is Mid-Term Election Day of Unimaginable Importance all across this wonderful land of ours. I think I speak for everyone when I say, “THANK GOD IT’S OVER.”

Now, I’m fairly politically aware. I even swing to the side of the aisle not usually occupied by my creative brethren. (A fact shocking to no one who reads this blog.) I hate looking at a ballot and realizing that I don’t know who this judge in District 3 is or if he’s a complete schmoe. But the problem with elections isn’t the dangling chads, electronic ballots that run on Windows 98 or that fact that registering to vote automatically throws you into the jury pool.

It’s the advertising. (Duh, like that wasn’t obvious.)

If you need me to explain why political advertising is hideous or need me to cite examples of such advertising, well, too bad. Turn on the TV or your radio and give it ten minutes.

Tomorrow, I celebrate. For then the political ads will vanish and I shall once again be confronted with the eternal question of: Who approved the tagline “Have a happy period”? ’Cause that ain’t right.

Later,

Fox